Friday Q&A

Questionable Redecoration

Greetings once again, crickets and trolls. Welcome back to the Friday Q&A, your source for all the answers to the questions I ask for you. I hope everyone had a great week. Today we're doing something special here at the Clinic. This edition is an all-Boner Q&A, dedicated to our favorite semi-anonymous troglodyte.


Q: Did Boner change Fark the Vote again?

A: Of course he did. Get with the times, idiot. Fark the Vote undergoes a template change every thirty seconds. He's currently got it set to the ugliest drab pink offered in Blogger's palette. He's also deleted any sort of written communication, which I for one applaud. It was starting to get crowded with all his asinine rantings jumbled together like that. If you're a fan of the classics, have no fear. You can still find all that infantile garbage at Boner's Toolbox. It's kind of like a landfill for mindless crap, or in Boner's case, a hazardous waste containment facility.

Q: Is the full extent of Boner's stupidity capable of being accurately expressed?

A: That's a stupid question, and you should be hated for asking it. Since you're such a clueless twat, I'm going to make a new voodoo doll in your likeness and cram a needle up its pee-hole. I'm sure it won't clash with the TSZ and Wayne Newton dolls that I already have.

The answer is no, of course. There's not currently a word in the English language to accurately describe the brainless idiocy of Edward Boner. I doubt he's even smart enough to appreciate the ironic overtones of this parody movie poster.


At this point, I want to pause in my anti-Boner rant to comment on how stupid the new movie "Untraceable" looks. It's the latest ripoff of Saw (which I never saw) except ZOMFG the killer is a computer hacker! I'm on the edge of my seat! *Yawn*

Back to Boner. If I was going to go out on a limb and create a new term to describe him, it would be something like "jackassholefucker" or "lackwit-moranitard." But I'm not in the word creation business. I'm in the blog creation business.

Q: Have you talked to Boner recently?

A: We had a noisy exchange a few days ago, but our dialogue hardly qualified as talk. His side of it was more like the incessant whine of an oscillating fan: boring, predictable, and ultimately just background noise. He's lucky I'm such a connoisseur of tritely-written tedium. I enjoy it almost as much as self-congratulatory braggadocio, because I'm just that awesome. I'm glad I was able to do such an excellent job answering your questions.


That's all for this week, gentle reader. I'm going to close the post by giving a shout out to my good friend TheSniperZERO. Sorry I didn't get a chance to taunt you more this time, buddy. Boner's such a drama-queen attention whore that I was sure he'd slit his wrists if I didn't write a few paragraphs about him. Don't think that I could ever hate him as much as I hate you.

Stay tuned for more affirmations of loathing from the Doctor!