Friday Q&A

Questionable Excretion

Greetings, crickets and trolls. Welcome to another special edition of the Friday Q&A. It appears that my efforts in taunting Boner have produced the opposite of my intended result. Instead of responding with a torrent of rhyming obscenities, my old foe has simply dried up and blown away. Perhaps another round of insults will throttle him back into existence.

Q: Did Boner delete Fark the Vote?

A: Apparently so. It looks like the blogger known as Edward Boner has written his last hate poem. It's a shame that he's too much of a bitch to troll here any more, but I'm glad that he still feels the need to lurk around for some reason. That way he can hear me scoffing at his pathetic attempts to act as a rival.

Q: Are the collected works of Edward Boner lost forever?

A: Fear not, gentle reader! Boner is far too stupid to do a thorough job of scrubbing his shit stains off the Internet. In his haste, he seems to have forgotten about the FtV mirror site. I guess he was too busy being a hopeless imbecile to notice. That's to be expected, of course. I'm surprised that Boner can blink and breathe at the same time. The man's only a couple of evolutionary notches above an Amoeba in terms of intelligence. On the other hand, I think like a Paramecium, and therefore can outsmart him at every turn.

Q: What was your favorite Boner moment?

A: That's a tough call, because there are so many. Like the time that he left dozens of anonymous comments, all written in the same brainless style, claiming in each one to be a different person. Or the time when he briefly switched sides, becoming a brown-nosing sycophant. Of course, his hollow praise fell on deaf ears. Honestly, Boner. Why do you bother waking up in the morning? I'm sure I speak for everyone who has ever received one of your "emails" when I say to DIAF. Stop mucking around my Internet, you fucking oxygen thief.

That's all for this time, gentle reader. Join me again next week, when I will be focusing on subjects that do not concern complete idiots. You can also look for the return of a few classic features, and even some new ones to spice things up. I'm at work on securing an interview with the proprietor of the Manipster.com website, as well as uncovering a evidence of a shocking conspiracy. You won't want to miss it.

Stay tuned for more investigative reporting from the Doctor!