Friday Q&A

Questionable Compensation

Greetings, crickets and trolls. Welcome to another edition of the Friday Q&A. In this weekly feature, I answer questions pertaining to the Fark Photoshop community. It's nice of you to join me for this third post of 2010. Get ready for the best decade ever! At least until the entire world is destroyed in 2012. Maybe if we start sacrificing virgins right now, the Mayan death gods will back off for a few more centuries. I'm totally in favor of this plan, even if it means losing most of the Clinic's reader base.

Q: Should Farkers be paid for their winning Photoshop entries?

A: This question comes up every now and then, seemingly more often during an economic downturn. I guess people are looking for ways to supplement their income without trying very hard. Certainly old moneybags Drew can share some of his Internet millions with the unwashed Fark masses. Is he so busy cleaning caviar stains off the upholstery of his Learjet that he fails to notice how truly unwashed the masses have gotten lately?

Q: Why is it a bad idea to offer rewards for Photoshopping?

A: It's not necessarily a bad idea. Many sites have implemented monetary rewards, after all. It's just a lousy idea for Fark. I don't know if you've noticed, but we have several contests post every day. Even if the reward was small, it would quickly become a financial sinkhole. Some people have suggested offering free TotalFark membership for winners. This too, is an idiotically shortsighted plan. Drew needs that five dollars a month from everyone. Learjet upholstery cleaner has gotten expensive since the economy went to shit.

Q: Wouldn't the addition of cash prizes attract more serious Photoshop participants?

A: Yes, and that's another huge problem with this idea. Drew doesn't have millions to spare attracting the top echelon of Photoshoppers. Even if he did, why the hell would he want to? So far, we've done a good job of avoiding the pretension that plagues many image mangling communities. Say what you will about the Golden Age, but Photoshop contests on Fark still brim with raw comedy whilst constantly attracting fresh faces. There is a level of accessibility that simply is not found elsewhere.

That's all for this time, gentle reader. Thanks again for stopping by. Don't worry about the looming threat of a Mayan apocalypse. I'm sure our government is taking steps, such as constructing subterranean fortresses with elaborate defensive grids to keep the unwashed rabble at bay.

Stay tuned for more security planning from the Doctor!