Friday Q&A

Questionable Education

Greetings, crickets and trolls. Welcome to another edition of the Friday Q&A. Thanks for joining me once again. If you're new to the Clinic, this weekly feature explores issues of interest to Fark's Photoshop community. As a common courtesy, I ask that all newcomers click the Paypal "donate" button and contribute some funds towards the upkeep of this blog. Give whatever you're comfortable with. Any amount of money is fine, assuming it can be quantified as a shitload.

Q: Why should people listen to you?

A: For starters, I'm always right, 100% of the time. This fact alone puts me head and shoulders above the now-deceased competition. A wise man was once quoted as saying, "the Doctor is a brilliant genius." I forget who said that, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't me. I usually don't describe myself without using the word "godlike."

Q: What makes you so smart?

A: It's not so much that I'm smart (though I totally am, don't think for a second that I'm not). It's that everyone else is so very, very stupid. That is by no means an insult to you personally. I'm sure you serve your purpose admirably. Stupid people are a valuable commodity, and have their place in any functioning society. Why do you think so many stores sell extended warranties?

Q: How can I get smarter?

A: I'm afraid that would be impossible. It's a sad fact that ignorance can never be fully cured. Even if it could, who would want to do such a thing? Someone has to buy all those extended warranties, and it sure as hell isn't going to be me. Most people seem happy enough being stupid. I, for one, am glad their ranks are so abundant.

That's all for this time, gentle reader. Thanks again for stopping by. I hope you enjoyed this look into the many stupid aspects of the human condition. I think you'll find it goes a long way towards explaining quite a few of life's mysteries, especially the voting outcome of many Fark Photoshop contests.

Stay tuned for more intellectual certitude from the Doctor!