Friday Q&A

Questionable Collaboration

Greetings, crickets and trolls. Welcome to another edition of the Friday Q&A. I'm glad you're here, because we have a lot to talk about this week. Recently, word was handed down from Drew about plans for a possible joint venture between Fark and the nascent image mangling community that has emerged at Fox News. Apparently, the Right wing media giant is seeking Photoshop talent. Drew knows some people at FNC, and ideas about cross-pollination between the two sites had been kicked around.

Q: How was the idea received by Fark's Photoshoppers?

A: Not at all well, and I think this really illustrates the partisan divide that exists in our country. Remember, it wasn't like FNC propositioned us to Photoshop a bunch of Right wing propaganda. But that was a conclusion that many of us were very quick to jump to. What I can say is that there don't seem to be many Liberal entries featured, which may have something to do with the rigorous submission process. Unlike Fark, all "Photo Op-inion" entries must be judged worthy by the Fox powers that be (who are so diligent that they allow watermarked images from Worth1000).

Q: Why is cooperation between Fark and Fox surprising?

A: I think shocking is a better word. I would never have thought Drew would get involved with Fox after this happened. Back in 2007, an employee of a Fox affiliate in Memphis phished Fark's modmins and attempted to hack the site. His attack failed on a spectacular level, but conspiracy theorists were abuzz with talk that he may have been acting on behalf of Newscorp, which has long had an interest in replicating certain aspects of Fark's design.

Q: Is involvement with Newscorp a bad thing?

A: To answer that question, I'll just refer you to the fabulous success stories of Photobucket and Myspace. The latter is now a virtual ghost town, and the former so heavily moderated that pictures of classical art get deleted as obscene. I think users of any political stripe would be hesitant to let Newscorp put its tentacles within striking distance of Fark. I don't see it as a matter of politics. Rupert Murdoch seemingly has no idea how to develop a web property. The fact that Fox's "Photo Op-inion" challenges display in slideshow format is not exactly doing much to prove me wrong.

That's all for this time, gentle reader. I will now attempt to assuage any fears my Liberal brethren may have of a potential corporate buyout by Rupert Murdoch's global hegemony. Something like that would only be possible if Drew really liked money. Have you seen Fark's main page recently? There is still a small portion not devoted to ad space. We obviously have nothing to worry about.

Stay tuned for more sarcastic reassurance from the Doctor!

Friday Q&A

Questionable Migration

Greetings, crickets and trolls. Welcome to another edition of the Friday Q&A. I'm glad you're here! Unless you disagree with me, in which case I'd rather you go be wrong elsewhere. In this weekly feature, I take a look at important issues facing the Fark Photoshop community. For the uninitiated, this column is like a newspaper editorial mixed with that show on public access cable where some twitchy guy stands behind a podium and rants incoherently. These days, I suppose a bit more of the latter than the former. Mescaline and late-stage Syphilis are apparently not a winning combination.

Q: Is the Scrutinizer still broken?

A: The beloved Scrutinizer, which catalogs our various Fark Photoshop contest entries, is now in even worse condition than the last time it was profiled here. Stats are completely offline, and the forums continue to experience difficulties with a host that can only be described as butthurt. I'm sure many of you are probably aware that the Scrutinizer's domain is set to expire in a couple of months. In all likelihood, it will not be renewed.

Q: What is being done to solve this issue?

A: Lucky for us, every generation of Fark 'shoppers has its share of Web geniuses. A new site is already in the works. On behalf of the spittle-flecked bogging community, I'd like to offer my sincere thanks to everyone involved in its construction. Whether or not the stats and listings already collected by the Scrutinizer will survive is yet to be seen. The Golden, Silver and Modern Ages may well collectively become the Forgotten Age.

Q: Will Fark ever incorporate stat tracking into our profiles?

A: This the question I've been asking since StovepipeBender took his Honor Roll offline. For too long, this community has had to rely on third party sites to archive our Photoshop entries. These places come and go, waxing and waning proportionately with each proprietor's interest in 'shopping. I have no idea how difficult it would be to incorporate at least part of what the Scrutinizer does into Fark's user profile page. But it's an idea at least worth suggesting to the powers that be.

That's all for this time gentle reader. Thanks for stopping by. I'd like to once again extend my appreciation to everyone involved in the construction of this new domain, and bid a fond farewell to the Scrutinizer. Mr Squirrel has been a vital part of this community, and his site has served us well for many years. I wish him the best of luck in his future projects.
Oh noes TSZ! You lost your legacy!
Stay tuned for more genuine gratitude from the Doctor!

Questionable Excavation

Greetings, crickets and trolls. Welcome to another edition of the Friday Q&A. I want to start by apologizing to everyone who lost money betting on the Super Bowl due to my misguided advice. I now realize that the Denver Broncos were not in fact a "sure thing" to win. Here's hoping they do better in the upcoming upcoming Winter Olympics. I've heard some pretty good things about their downhill skiing program this year.

Q: Have you been trapped indoors by the Snowpocalypse?

A: I believe the correct term is "Snowmaggeddon", and thankfully it looks like I dodged that particular bullet. The abandoned oil drilling platform in international waters that I live on for tax purposes doesn't see much winter weather. However, I feel the pain of my East Coast brothers and sisters, many of whom are currently either frozen corpses or trapped inside with nothing to do but talk to family members. It's one of those situations were the survivors envy the dead.

Q: What supplies do you stock up on for this type of scenario?

A: Whoa, slow down there. I'm pretty sure you don't want to over-prepare for a snow storm. Besides, panicked citizens have no doubt already grabbed most of the useful stuff from the grocery store. But who needs that overpriced crap, anyway? If you're smart, you already stocked up on Sno Cone flavoring and paper funnel cups. That way, the blizzard will provide a sumptuous bounty of flavored ice.

Q: Is a blizzard conducive to Photoshopping?

A: Certainly, provided you can keep your fingers from succumbing to frostbite. In weather like this, you can either fight polar bears on your way to the mailbox, or sit back and enjoy having an excuse not to get off your lazy ass for once. In other words, it's a great time to Photoshop. At least until you run out of paper funnel cups.

That's all for this time, gentle reader. Thanks again for stopping by. Here's hoping this blizzard thaws before cadaver dogs have to dig your frozen corpse out of the snow drift where your house used to be. Until then, you're welcome to as many of my world-famous "banana" flavored Sno Cones as you can eat.

Stay tuned for more frosted treats from the Doctor!

Friday Q&A

Questionable Comparison

Greetings, crickets and trolls. Welcome to another edition of the Friday Q&A. This weekly feature takes a look at issues facing Fark's Photoshop community. We've caught Super Bowl fever here at the Picture Clinic, as we were unable to afford a costly Super Bowl flu shot. This year, I'll even be offering my pick for winner of the big game.

Q: What is the best image search engine?

A: When searching for source images, there are several options at your disposal. Google has been the standard for a few years now, followed closely by Yahoo. Microsoft now offers Bing, a vast improvement over the impotent Live search, which as we all know was used mostly by racists and pedophiles. Apart from the Big Three of Yahoo, Google and Bing (I call them the Axis of Access) there are several other alternatives. Nowadays, pretty much every two-bit engine includes an option to search images.

Q: How do the Big Three stack up?

A: This question has been a matter of debate for some time. To get a definitive answer, I tried entering the same term into all three search engines. I'm pretty sure no one in the history of the Internet has thought to do this before. The results of my comprehensive test are listed below.

Google
Yahoo
Bing

As you can see, a simple term that normal people use every day delivers very disparate results amongst the three competitors. Their method of display varies a bit, too. Google and Yahoo share the conventional multi-page format, whilst Bing opts to show everything on one. If you're the last remaining human with a dial-up connection, the latter might cause some loading difficulties for you. But you're probably used to that sort of thing by now.

Q: Shouldn't a good Photoshopper use all three and more?

A: NO. Search engines are like football teams. You pick yours and stay with it. I chose Google a long time ago, and it suits me well. Others might like Yahoo. If you're a kiddie diddler or a white supremacist, you probably will choose Bing. My point is, pick one and stick with it religiously. I follow the same rationale when I bet on the Denver Broncos to win every Super Bowl game. They might not have much of a chance this year, since they aren't playing, but that didn't stop me from betting last week's paycheck. Go Broncos!

That's all for this time, gentle reader. Thanks again for stopping by. In what has become a media tradition, I will now offer my pick for the winner of this year's Super Bowl. I don't know much about the sport of football (it's the one where you score points by hitting the other team with a stick, right?) but my intuition tells me the Broncos will win by at least 100 touchdowns.
RIP Barrump
Stay tuned for more Super Bowl victories from the Broncos!